Planning Life

I can be spontaneous sometimes.

To those that know me... stop laughing!

I really can do things spur of the moment and be a "fly by the seat of my pants" kinda girl at times. (Oh goodness... did I really just take a line from "Pretty Woman"?)

But I am a planner more than not. It is just my nature to plan. Make lists. Know where I'm going. An occasional spontaneous activity balances out my rigidness. (Yes, I know that is not a word... I am intellectually jumpy today, go with it, okay?)

Alright, back to my point. I'm at a time in my life where some major planning has to happen.

Husband and I had some long discussions this past weekend. I asked him if there was a possibility that we could plan to buy a bigger house at some point in the future. After going over the numbers, we have decided that summer '08 would be the best time financially. Right now that seems a lifetime away, but I know how fast time can go by. I am fine working toward that goal... saving, planning, waiting. This will actually be easy for me as I usually do not feel the need to indulge in spending a lot of money.

But it's the other thing that's making me all crazy. I became a homemaker when I was pregnant with my oldest. He is now 13 years old. You do the math. I have not been part of the work force in oh-so-very long.

Well, that's kinda true. I have done quite a few desktop publishing jobs and I have also been hired to make scrapbook pages for others. But it wasn't consistent work, you know? My number one priority and focus was raising my kids. I am happy and proud to have done what I've done so far. I couldn't imagine it any other way.

And now I find myself at this point in my life... my youngest child is off to all day kindergarten this next school year. No noses to wipe, no Play-Dough cookies to make, no toddler songs to sing, no teaching ABC's and 1,2,3's... just a quiet house.

It's tempting to continue to do what I love and be "just a homemaker"... I do enjoy tending to the home, to the family, to work on my scrapbooks, and taking the occasional job that comes my way. My husband has never pressured me to be more, or do more than I do. But I want more. I have ambition, motivation, and drive.

So what do I do now? That is an easy decision... I want to get more education. I know what my passion is. Graphic design is the kind of work that makes me happy. (That's why scrapbooking is such an outlet for me; working with photos, graphics, fonts, colors, layout and design... it just speaks to my soul.)

I am in the process of investigating different schools and what would work best for me. I am leaning toward doing internet based classes. I am blown away at the cost to get an associates degree, let alone a bachelors... that is not going to help our house buying plans! Ugg, what to do?

I am just trying to pull this all together and make it work. I know it would take a lot of time and energy on my part to get that degree and finally be a "real" graphic designer in the eyes of potential employers. I am willing to put in the work to get there... but I feel I am sacrificing a bigger home for my family if I pursue this dream right now.

We have outgrown the space in this house. When we moved here, I had one child and one on the way. Now we have three children and the house is bursting at the seams.

Okay, so this post is one long rambling... I guess I'm just trying to figure it all out, see what may be possible. If I come up with a solid plan, I'll let you know.

2005 Highlights

Just a little something I put together...

Click here to see some of my favorite photos and memories of 2005.

SERIOUSLY!

Okay, I give up...

My new favorite word to use when frustrated is the same as the title of this post.

Thanks for playing, there are no parting gifts.

LOL

Seriously?

No one watches Grey's Anatomy?

No guesses?

No love?

:-)

The Grey Area In My Life

I have a new favorite word. I've been saying it a lot lately... usually when the children are bickering or there is too much going on.

Want to try to guess what it is?

Here are some clues:

- It is something said in frustration or anger.

- It is nine letters long.

- If you watch Grey's Anatomy (which is one of THE best shows out there right now in my opinion), you might immediately guess what the word is. There was one episode where they used this word so many times that it was permanently burned into my brain. Now it's a knee-jerk reaction for me to use this word when upset. One last thing on Grey's Anatomy... if you are obsessed with this show like I am, you might be interested in reading this blog: Grey Matter.

Okay, any guesses on what my new favorite word is?

Thank Goodness For GOOD News!!!

The pathology report is in... The mass was pre-cancerous, but we got it out before it turned ugly in there!!!!

WHEW!!!!

I know that all of your thoughts and prayers had something to do with how well this turned out... thank you everyone!!!!

Water Update

First off, I want to sincerely thank all of you for your personal emails, comments, thoughts and prayers. I know I haven't replied to them all personally, but please know that each and every one of those contributions meant the world to me.

So the procedure is done. As far as we know, the doc was able to remove the entire mass. This is excellent news. Even if it does turn out to be malignant, it didn't penetrate the bowel wall or go into any lymph nodes. We are expecting the pathology report to come in on Thursday. We are hoping and praying that the result is benign.

Thank you to all my dear friends who continue to keep us in their hearts and minds.

Is There Something In The Water?

I will spare you the details, but due to some issues I've been having recently, I had a colon x-ray done today. There is definitely a mass in my colon. I am to have a colonoscopy done on Monday to let the doctor look at it and he will also try to remove it if possible.

I'd write more, but I am still in shock and pretty speechless at the moment.

Happy New Year

The Christmas Tree is packed up once again, the children's bedrooms adorn new toys, my feet are very warm thanks to receiving slipper socks for Christmas, and I have pictures to scrap. The holidays are over, and I am content.

My husband took a week and a half of vacation over the holidays and the children were off of school. What did we do? We enjoyed ourselves!! I slept in until at least 9:00 am every morning. We played so many board games. Family and friends visited. Household duties were shared. Some days were spent wearing our PJs all day long. Ahhh, it was heaven!!

Although my husband is back to work this week, the children are still off of school. I hope we can get through this week without too many bickering episodes. I have activities planned, so they won't have too much idle time on their hands.

The (not so big) surprise of the new year so far? My five year old daughter decided to cut her own bangs yesterday. ARGH!!!!!!!!!

I know that little girls sometimes do this. After she was born and her spunky and spirited personality emerged, I knew she would be the type to try this out at some point. For this reason, when she was of age to start learning how to cut, I bought her a pair of children's safety scissors that guaranteed not to cut hair or skin. Well, it didn't cut paper too well either and was a source of endless frustration.

As she grew older, I started letting her use the better kid scissors. Since the age of 3 or so, I have had quite a few discussions with her about scissors and what she is allowed to cut verses not to cut. Hair was definitely on the "do not cut" list. She promised me she'd never do that. She betrayed me.

When I noticed the missing hair, I calmly asked her, "Why did you cut your hair?"

Her response was "I didn't."

I told her that I could see that she had and needed to know why she did.

"Because you said my bangs were getting long," she sadly replied.

She got me there. I had just said that 2 days earlier.

"Yes, I did say that" I said, "But that didn't mean that you should cut your own hair. When your hair is ready for a trim, we go to the salon."

She feels bad, she promises she will never do it again, and she hopes nobody will laugh at her because it looks funny. Ah, the joys of having a daughter!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!